How to Overcome The Fear of Rejection
Feeling uncomfortable in the stomach, cold sweaty palm, trembling of legs, losing the ability to think correctly when approaching a girl? Hate yourself for not able to overcome this problem? Oh? please do not feel so. Believe me, you are not the only one facing this problem. In fact, this is a very common problem in man. Everyone is just like you, not willing to admit it openly, having the fear of being laughed and mocked by others. But there's absolutely nothing wrong for feeling so. Well approaching a girl, asking her out for a date isn't really as scary as you thought. For all you may know, the girl is just as or even more nervous than you. Some guys are born with the natural flair with girls while some guys are just born shy. But that doesn't mean that they can't do as good. In fact, shy men are whom most girls are looking for. It's a pity that all the good men are hiding up leaving the girls with not much of a choice but to hang out with the jerks. So how can you overcome your fear? Well, this is something that I can't help you. You simply just got to make that first step, that very first attempt. Hmm? still feeling too nervous? Ok, perhaps we should take things a little slower. There's actually no urgent need for you to just walk up to a girl and ask her out for a date. Too sudden? You might just scare her off. But please, don't take for ages before someone else try to cut in the queue. I don't suppose you memorized your whole school textbook before going for your exams? It's the same thing, you don't need to wait till you fully overcome your fear before you approach a girl. Hmm? anyway, I should believe that the both of you are at least like normal friends? Classmates? Colleagues or?? Whatever it is, grab any chance to get closer to her. Too shy to strike a conversation with her? Look her in the eyes, drop her a nice warm smile. Make her notice you, make her remember you, let her know that you exist! You be surprised, your eyes can actually work more wonders than to words at times. All these will eventually boost the chance of success when approaching her at a later date. She will naturally feel more comfortable with you than to be approached by a total stranger. Ok, now that you have done all of what you can do, no more excuses from you! Stop hiding up, it's time to make your move. Now, I want you to follow very closely after me. Take a deep breathe, gather all your courage. She is sitting all alone on the bench under the tree. Slowly and steady, you walk towards her. Yes, step by step getting nearer and nearer. She turns and saw you approaching. Remember, she has seen you before, she knows who you are. Now look her in the eyes, smile at her. She greets you with her nice gentle smile. One final step, you stop in front of her. "Hi, what a coincides to see you here", you say to her in a nice, friendly voice. "Busy with anything now? How about a little coffee together?" Smiling so sweetly at you she replies teasingly, "Your treat? Sure why not??" Hey you still with me? Ha sorry, was just trying to play a little game of hypnosis with you. Did I fare horribly? Well anyway, it would really be so lovely if things were as what I had described? Why not? Why couldn't it be possible? You see, the problem with most people is that they always tend to create negative thoughts; creating an image of failure, an image of been rejected in their mind before things actually happen. Subconsciously, they have actually rejected themselves before anyone else could even reject them and yes, the likely chances is they will fail. Just like in soccer matches, when David Beckham scores from his spectacular free kick? If at the moment before he even lifts his feet, he was creating the image of ballooning away the ball over the goal post in his mind, you think he will score? So why not picture things the other way round, telling your mind; yourself that you are going to make it? It will definitely boosts your confidence and the chance of a success. Hmm? hope you are feeling more comfortable and less nervous now? Well, the chance of being rejected is nonetheless still there. So what should happen if you really fail? You should learn to graciously accept the rejection. It's perfectly alright, my friend. At least you know you have tried? You finally pluck out that courage? There's nothing to feel ashamed of. Picture it this way; you are the one being approached instead. Approached by a girl that's not of your type. You would have rejected her as well, wouldn't you? But would you make fun of her, laugh and mock at her? I should believe not? Instead, you would have felt happy and thankful to her; it's just a pity that she's not your type of girl? That's exactly how the girl whom rejected you would have felt too; it's just a pity that you are not her type of guy. Nobody would be laughing at you, probably they would be admiring you for your courage instead. Though you might be rejected but believe me, once there's a first time the rest will just come naturally. You might be sad and disappointed but once you get yourself back, you would have remembered that it wasn't as scary what you had thought. You would have probably already overcome a great deal of your fear. It's just like the first time driving out on your own after getting your license. For some unlucky ones, meeting up with a little accident. But that doesn't stop them from driving on? In fact, experiences were gained. So was confidence along the way, driving more smoothly, stepping even harder on the accelerator? Well, rejection is part and parcel of life. It's not only in love that you get rejected. In life, you are faced with more rejections. Rejections from your work? Your boss? Your business associates? Even your own family? But that won't stop you from moving on in life? Last but not least, there's one thing you have to accept. The fact that, you are a man! It's afterall still the guy's job to do the asking. You just gotta do it and I am sure you can do it yeah? Rick Valens
Staff Writer
http://www.loveletterbox.com
Love Relationship Discussion Forum NOTE: You're free to republish this article on your website, in your newsletter, in your e-book or in other publications provided that the article is reproduced in its entirety, including the author information and all live website link as above.
Related News
|
 |
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
10 Fast Ways to Re-Igniting Romance
Research shows that people who put each other down and are hostile to each other are more likely to have serious problems .
Dating Sites for You and Me
Have you seen a dating site? Would you want to see one? How many people have met their loved-ones through chatrooms and online dating? Introducing DATING SITES. The known region and favorite stops of internet junkies and online love adventure-seekers of the present generation for they have the latest features for meeting people worldwide. The sites are unimaginably packed with dating services that will surely tickle the fancy of single (and non-single) men and women in the universe. See for yourself.
Online Dating Secret
There is a simple online dating secret that can save you a lot of time and energy!
Googling for Love
Google: (GOO.gul) v. To use an Internet search engine such as Google.com to look for information related to a new or potential girlfriend or boyfriend.
Dating Tips: Creating The Perfect Atmosphere
Had you ever been in the situation where your heart suddenly beats so fast, losing your ability to think, having the sudden loss for words when seeing someone you admired? At that very moment, you were like frozen in time, lost into another world, a world so wonderful, so heavenly? Hmm? How's my description? Ha whatever, the fact is that at that very moment, you were totally defenseless. So defenseless that anything could have just hit you. An arrow? An arrow of love? Get what I mean?
Change Your Body Language to Be Relaxed When Approaching Somebody New
Get a Girl To Seduce You By Changing Your Body Language.
Best Places to go on a Date
Does the waiter know how you like your steak, and more about your love life than you do yourself? You are stuck in a "boring-dates syndrome"! Or perhaps you are conducting a psychological experiment on the people you date, and trying to keep the environment constant... It is at least good your haven't just given up on trying yet! Perhaps this is not quite you, but you do feel bored with your dating life, or you stopped dating all together.
Online Dating -- Facts About Your Online Profile
Times are changing and online dating is becoming a more and more popular way of finding a partner. There are so many lucky people whom the Internet has helped to meet the love of their life, that online dating hardly needs additional publicity. Online dating, like everything in life, has its tricks and traps and in order to be successful when dating online, you need to know the things that are important, and the things to avoid.
5 Mistakes Men Make On The First Date
The number one mistake made by men on the first date is trying to buy love. The first date is not a marriage proposal; it's merely an opportunity to measure compatibility. If it doesn't work out, you will have spent all that cash on a fancy restaurant and red roses for nothing. Unfortunately, the IRS has not declared bad dates to be tax deductible expenses.
The Truth About Women Revealed
Have you ever imagined what it would be like to read a woman's to mind - especially a woman you want to get into your bed? How about just being able to fake it enough that she thinks you can read her mind?
Yahoo Personals Offers a Great Way to Meet and Date New People
With more people turning to online dating every year, it's only fair to say that Yahoo personals is rising to be one of the most successful dating services on the Internet today!
Adult Dating: Friend or Foe - Your Sex Life and the Internet!
There was a time when finding a date, partner, lover or playmate online was frowned upon. It was for people who couldn't get a date any other way!
Oh how things have changed?not only can you sign up to a site listing thousands of singles who match your height, size, location and taste in food?now you can choose your sex partners too.
Compliments - A Very Powerful Dating Tool!
Giving a compliment can be a very powerful tool when dating women. Of course, too many compliments can also make you look desperate and needy. There needs to be a happy medium. So, what is the key? As outlined in my book "the Ultimate Online Dating Handbook" you need to give a compliment from a position of power. If you can master this one form of communication then she will see you as a powerful person and continue to crave your attention and approval.
Dating Mistakes
Dating mistakes can kill a dating relationship. Do you know what dating mistakes you have made? Do dating mistakes hold your relationship back? And, do mistakes like these get forgotten later on? Dating mistakes are simply things that you just don't do right. To avoid them, though, you have to know what your partner considers a dating mistake.
Top 10 Photo Blunders
The following no-nonsense list was compiled from interviews with long-time online daters and the business executives and support staff of several major online dating services. What's the bottom line? The single most important part of online dating is how you handle the simple act of representing yourself with photos.
Objections Are Signs Somebody Is Interested
The fact is, most people think they handle objections with ease.
The reality paints a different picture. There are claims that you
could have closed a large % of people who gave you objections by
simply understanding why the person you are talking to is objecting.
Oh...and by keeping your mouth closed for a minute or two.
Online Dating For Dummies
Whether you have been dating for years, getting back in the game, or just starting out, you could always use a bit of dating advice. Not the kind you get from your mother, but rather the kind that actually might get you past the first date, on to the 2nd and perhaps on to a happily ever after.
What To Put On A Dating Site Profile And What To Leave Out
Your dating site profile is the most important tool you have to find love online-and fast. It's the identity that you put forward to other online daters, it's what people see when they're looking for people like you and it's all you've got to make a first impression and pull in the proposals.
Defining a Relationship
How does one know when a relationship is really a relationship? Very good question for all of us to ponder don't you think? Generally, when you meet someone and decide to persue some type of relationship, you most often think if the other person agrees to go out with you multiple times, one begins to think that you "click" and that maybe, just maybe this time it might work out. Do we all live in a dream world? I must make it clear that I am not "profiling" either sex as both genders are guilty of this practice. Sometimes when you meet and things click along beautifully you just automatically assume that they are just as interested in you as you are them, not always the case and we need to be aware of the signs that tell us this.
Online Dating for Beginners
There are many online dating sites, all of them require you to be at least 18 years of age. The two that I really liked, were Match.com and Yahoo Personals. Match.com is probably the largest online dating site ever, it allows you to create a profile, and search for other profiles for free. You can also send winks (basically a notification that you like someone's profile) to other people for free. In order to actually send emails to other users, you need to be subscribed, which costs a small monthly fee (this can range from $9.99 to $29.99 depending on the site).
|
